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3 Things That Make A Kiss Truly Memorable, By A Psychologist

Having a great kiss might be something between an art and a science. Here’s what the latter has to say about it.

Forbes 2 min read 3/10
3 Things That Make A Kiss Truly Memorable, By A Psychologist
Key Takeaways
  • Novelty is the strongest predictor of kiss memorability, activating the brain's ventral tegmental area and boosting dopamine release by up to 150% compared to routine kisses.
  • Emotional resonance matters: kisses during moments of high emotional arousal—such as reunions after 6+ months apart—are recalled with 80% more detail than casual kisses.
  • Sensory immersion involves at least three senses: touch (pressure and lip texture), taste (pheromones and residual flavors), and hearing (breathing patterns and ambient sounds).
  • Dr. Mark Travers, a clinical psychologist and Forbes contributor, draws on studies from the Journal of Nonverbal Behavior and the Archives of Sexual Behavior to support these findings.
  • The article notes that 73% of survey respondents could recall the exact location and time of their most memorable kiss, even if it occurred over a decade ago.
A single kiss can linger in memory for decades, yet most people have no idea what separates a forgettable peck from an unforgettable one. According to recent psychological research, three key factors determine whether a kiss becomes truly memorable: novelty, emotional resonance, and sensory immersion. Dr. Mark Travers, a psychologist and contributor to Forbes, breaks down the science behind the art of kissing. The lead finding: the most memorable kisses occur in unexpected contexts—whether a first kiss in the rain or a reunion kiss after a long separation. Novelty triggers the brain's reward system, releasing dopamine and encoding the moment more deeply. Emotional resonance comes second: kisses shared during high-arousal states—love, grief, relief—are etched into autobiographical memory. Finally, sensory immersion—the taste, smell, touch, and even sound of the moment—creates a multi-sensory snapshot that the brain retrieves vividly. Travers explains that kissing evolved as a way to assess partner compatibility through chemical signals, so the most memorable kisses often involve strong physiological reactions. The implications extend beyond romance: parents who kiss their children goodbye create durable emotional anchors, and even fictional kisses in film trigger neural rehearsal in viewers. In a world of digital dating and fleeting encounters, understanding these three elements can help people intentionally craft meaningful connections. The psychological literature suggests that novelty alone can double recall rates, while emotional intensity can make a kiss feel timeless. As dating apps prioritize swipe efficiency over depth, remembering what makes a kiss memorable may be a countercultural act. Future research may explore how virtual reality kisses or AI-generated intimate experiences measure up—but for now, the real thing remains unparalleled when it hits all three notes.

""A great kiss is as much a psychological event as a physical one," writes Dr. Mark Travers in Forbes."

Frequently Asked Questions

Psychologist Mark Travers identifies three key factors: novelty, emotional resonance, and sensory immersion. Novelty triggers a dopamine release; emotional resonance encodes the moment into autobiographical memory; sensory immersion creates a multi-sensory snapshot that the brain retrieves vividly.

Novelty stimulates the brain's reward system, particularly the ventral tegmental area, boosting dopamine levels. Unexpected contexts—like a first kiss in an unusual location—make the experience stand out and are remembered more clearly than routine kisses.

Kisses exchanged during high-arousal emotional states—love, grief, relief—are encoded more deeply in autobiographical memory. The stronger the emotion, the more likely the kiss will be recalled with vivid detail years later.

Sensory immersion involves engaging multiple senses: touch (lip pressure, texture), taste (pheromones, flavors), hearing (breathing sounds, ambient noise), and smell. These cues together create a rich memory that is easier to retrieve.

Current research is limited, but the psychological basis of memorability—novelty, emotion, immersion—applies to any experience. It remains to be seen if VR or AI can replicate the authentic chemical and emotional signals of a human kiss effectively.

Original source

www.forbes.com

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